happy on the surface , bleeding deep inside .

im bored now ,
and i was thinking , if only you
did not leave me , i would be
playing with you , feeding you
like you never eat in 1oo days,
teaching you tricks ,
tempting you foods to see you being happy .
i would flood the whole place with my tears
to get you back, pay as much as i can ,
although i know nth will happen or change ,
i only can continue dreaming ,
crying ot make me feel better .
yeh , i think this is the first time i shed so
much tears for someone ,for sth .
i love you , and i will never get you out
of my heart , cause the scar you left on
me, on my heart is just too big
and it can never be mend or sewn ,
for i too love you .


its just the beginning of life and
you thought me how to be strong ,
because you taught me how to
stand whn i fall , cheer me up whn im down,
you are more thn a friend ,
more thn a family member .
the tissues on my table is my proof .
no matter whr you are , thr will always
be a place for you in my heart .
i just cant stop crying now , i need
to get over you , but i dont want to forget
the memories we spent tgt .
everyday for almost 4 years .
you made me into a completely different person ,
someone who will be careful whn falling in love
again , because i dw to fall so deep into
a hole and to not crawl out, by myself .
i know tht you are still here with me mentally
although you are gone physically .
i really missed and still can imagine ,
you being here with me .
everytime i looked at your sleeping place ,
i could see you , everytime i looked at the
door , i could see you wagging your tail ,
waiting for me to return home from sch .
without you , life has 1 less meaning to carry on .
without you i feel so lonely whn im bored ,
without you i feel even sad whn im down ,
without you i would break down whn i fall .
i missed your morning barks , waiting for
me to pat you whn you are awake ,
i missed bringing you for walks ,
i missed bathing you ,
i missed pampering you ,
i missed your cute -nest ,
i missed how you used your pathetic face
to make me forgive you with every mistake you made .
i missed how you would come to me
whenever you are afraid .
i missed every part of you .
i wonder whr are you now ,
they have given me your tag ,
so i guess you have reached your life's
last place , you spent your whole lifetime
with me , although i did not give you
wht you wanted at times ,
i suppose you had wonderful memories
of me and your gardians , who is now
not in singapore and many more :)
take care okay , i forgive you for all
your mistakes and the blood we
have shed for you , but i'll never
forget you , even if im forced to do so .
i know you can see me crying now .
because i loved you too much
and because you made me never to take
you out of my memories .



my only request ;
dont forget me your sister, gardian and mother .
ILY .

in memorial of you .